Kalkarindji / SB 113 - safety pins, cards, fire blankets

Posted on 2024, Sat Apr 20th, @ 3:21am by Outpost Captain Savage Ivanov

1,176 words; about a 6 minute read

Mission: The Attack Of the Cadavera(Starbase 113/Outpost/Townsend)
Location: Kalkarindji Outpost
Timeline: current

"The cargo transporter Mollymook, will arrive in ten days, there is a vast number of items that were cleared from a number of SF and other facilities. Amongst them you'll find a hidden load."

King Ivanov looked at the piles of stores, supplies, trunks, equipment, tanks, cans, boxes, cartons, containers, baskets, buckets and more. Running one hand over his whiskered face, he stepped over a pile of flat items and narrowly avoided sending a tower of small boxes tumbling into the next tower.

"What is all this shit?"

"Welcome to Kyaron's world." The women who stood in for Kyaron answered from where she sat. "Mollymook gets packed to the brim with anything and everything. Somewhere in amongst the general stuff, is usually a hidden lot. We simply get it removed from the Mollymook, onto the deck. We identify the hidden load, which has this symbol." Tiera, held up a small box, with the black SNI letters. "We advise the boss, he comes or sends someone to collect everything with SNI on it. The rest Kyaron opens box, crate, tub, container, roll and identifies where it is going. Once she's got a fair amount she calls the walkers, who come and collect, delivering it to where she's determined where it goes. We keep going until everything's in it's new place. Then Kyaron puts what Kalk doesn't need, want or can make profit from, up on the board and it goes up for sale. Once it's paid, it's bundled and goes off for delivery. Kyaron also allocates what gets sent to 113, and their fleet."

King ran his hand over his scalp and wanted to scream. "I suppose if I change anything, I'll be wearing Savage's boot up my butt."

"Yep."

"Okay." King picked up a pile of small to medium boxes. I'll call. You answer. I'll label and move."

"Got it." Tiera sat in the chair facing the large screen.

"Screws. Screws. Screws." King scanned each of the first pile.

"We've got eleven hundred and seventy two boxes of seventy five different sized screws. So three hundred boxes stay in Kalk stores. Four hundred go to 113. The rest go for sale."

"Disposable adult diapers?"

"One hundred cartoons each with two thousand in. Kalk takes thirty. 113 takes twenty and the rest goes for sale."

"Decorative toilet seats. SFS."

"Starfleet Standard." Tiera answered. "Three hundred and eleven boxes each with a dozen smaller boxes, each of them containing a dozen individual toilet seats. Kalk gets one hundred boxes. One hundred to 113 and the rest for sale."

King aimed the dispatch scanner at the pile, and watched the labels change colour. "Urine jars?"

"Sample jars. Nine Hundred and sixty three boxes, each box has twelve smaller boxes each with two hundred individual jars. Two hundred for Kalk. Four hundred for 113, Rest for sale."

"Tongue Depressors."

"One thousand, eight hundred and ninety two boxes, each box has cartons of three thousand in each. So Kalk gets two hundred boxes, 113 gets three hundred boxes and the rest for sale."

"Seeds."

"Seventeen thousand, nine hundred and twenty two boxes. Each box has one thousand packets. Kalk takes half. half of the rest goes to 113 and remaining goes to Valt to..."

"The new Ivanov Growers Centre." King answered. "Where does it say what the seeds are?"

"It doesn't. So it's pot luck what you get."

"Right. Medical stirrups."

"Two hundred and one boxes. Each box has fifty sets. Forty to Kalk. Forty to 113 and rest for sale."

"Vibrators."

"Sexual or massage?"

"Doesn't say."

"Six hundred and fifty boxes, each box has smaller boxes fifty in each, each of the fifty smaller boxes has one hundred vibrators. Two hundred to Kalk. Two hundred to 113 and rest for sale."

"Frogs. Snakes. Cattle. Balls......"

"Chewable candy in various shapes. Two thousand Eight hundred and two large boxes, each large has one hundred small boxes each containing five kilos of candy. Kalk takes half. 113 gets half of what's left and the remainder gets halved for Valt and then what's left for sale."

"Mens underwear."

"Five thousand four hundred and seventy two boxes. Each box has one hundred smaller boxes, each with one hundred different sized pieces. Kalk fifty boxes. Two thousand to 113. Rest for sale."

"Why does Kalk only..."

"Because most of you don't wear knickers. It's a dump load." Tiera looked at King's expression. "Takes a long time to sell."

King didn't ask. He merely moved on. "Mud."

"Scrubbing mud. Skin care product. DCE hates it. It clogs up the pipes. Eleven thousand boxes. Each box has two hundred individual jars. Used to be called Mud Skin Care. Now is called Mud. SF won't open, 113 will just allocate to their ships. People love it. DCE hates it. Causes major issues. One thousand boxes for Kalk. Six thousand boxes for 113. Rest for sale."

"Coffee."

"Sixteen thousand boxes. Each box has smaller boxes. Each with two hundred satchels. Four thousand Kalk. Four thousand 113 and rest for sale."

"Toilet squares."

"Small squares of moisturized material, that soothes sore butts. Sixteen thousand four hundred and eighty boxes. Each box has packets which have two thousand squares. Kalk gets eight thousand. 113 gets five thousand, rest for sale."

"Toilet circles. Toilet patches. Toilet Sprays. Bum relievers. Smell cancellors. PWS."

"Personal Waste Softeners. It's put in the water to keep crews turds from being too hard and causing blockages in the pipes. All other mentioned are to either wipe your butt, or remove the smell. Twenty Nine thousand boxes, each box contains one hundred smaller boxes which contain five hundred packs of two hundred. Kalk three thousand. 113 sixteen thousand, Rest to be sold."

"Inflatable male dolls."

"What can I say, last load we got half a million boxes. Each with two hundred in them. They sold for five hundred a doll." Tiera answered with a shrug. Half goes for sale. half of the half left, stays and the rest go to 113."

"I'm not even going to ask." King answered. "Replicator Uniform Plates?"

"RUP. They are discs which go into replicators. There is only so much gear an individual can take on a ship. So instead of taking twenty uniforms, room replicators get RUPs. When a uniform gets dirty it is returned, the particles are degenerated, and new particles are formed into a new uniform. Only last two times they were mislabelled. Townsend got Klingon uniforms and Halo got Roman toga's. Anyway there is nineteen thousand eleven hundred and twenty two rounds. Each round has eight tubs and each tub has twelve plates. Kalk keeps six thousand. 113 gets the rest."

"Mini Mads." King raised an eyebrow.

"Some one decided to make a lollypop in the shape of Mad in her NonAtmo. Mad in all her glory. Mad in action. Etc, Etc, Etc. Each time they make more, they send Mad boxes. We send the lot to Mad. They same creator makes Mad action figures. They get sent to several charities and we send anything marked to Mad, too Mad. It's big in the constructor world."

"Right. Toe nail clippers."

"Three hundred and..........."

Part two coming...

"Right.

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